Master Crumble for dinner

Hello. I started an internship at Epitaph Records Europe last week and have been pretty busy since then. Epitaph also does Hellcat Records, Burning Heart Records and ANTI Records. Neko Case debuted at #3 on the US Billboard chart and she is on ANTI. People at work are losing their shit. The album is really nice. Listen to it if you like chicks with nice voices playing nice country-ish music. Journalism degree and I still really like using the word nice. Nice. This is the first time in about two months that I've worked (I work 10-6 five days a week) at a desk, and to be honest I am really enjoying be back in an office and having a bit of a routine. I guess it helps that I'm not working at the Department of Main Roads anymore... This job is a touch more exciting.

So I guess I knew before I came over here that it was going to be a stretch for me to get a full time job with solid cash in this industry, however I think I really underestimated the current global economic crisis... If shit doesn't work out so well then Brisbane might cop a raw deal and be seeing me a whole lot sooner than planned... Having said that, I'm staying positive. The Hold Steady - Stay Positive. (Reminds me I never got around to doing a Top 10 records of last year. I might do that if I get bored at work this week...)

Anyway, I used to do a lot of work with Alma from Epitaph when I worked for Atticus/Macbeth, so she was nice enough to hook me up this work even though she said I am "way over qualified" to be doing it... Pretty minimal cash as its an internship, but fuck it, I get to work with some cool people and I get paid some cash each month as well as a shit tonne of free vinyl and CDs and shows etc, so its not all bad. Another good thing is that I'll probably get some tours out of it. Epitaph just started a merch company, so there should be a bit of work for me in the next few months that will pay properly. Hopefully Warped Tour in one capacity or another...

Other than that, I haven't been doing too much. We don't have the internet at home anymore because whichever neighbour we were stealing wireless from figured it out. Bummer. I did stay up until 4am a few nights though talking shit on msn to people in Australia and downloading a lot of music, so I guess we milked it for all it was worth. I'm still staying at Gijs and Santina's place in the living room. I owe them one hundred thousand vegan Euros. Or even better, I will just return the favour when they come to Australia to hang out. Pretty sure the Dutch hung out in Australia before Captain Cook did... It'll be like homecoming when they come down.

Gijs and Santina scored a washing machine off their friends the other night, so Gijs' parents came to Amsterdam to help pick it up and get it into the flat. Flats in Amsterdam are generally in the four or so floors above the shop fronts on the road level. Gijs and Santina live on the first floor. Thank the sweet Duke John for that! Gijs, his mate, his dad and myself had to carry a washing machine down four flights of stairs and load it into Gijs' dad's car. That sucked. The Dutch didn't design their hallways and stairwells for fatties, let alone four dudes trying to carry an antique washing machine. The thing weighed more than Nina's fridge at our old place. Luckily the hallway was a decent width.

So we get it back to Gijs' flat, but there is no way it is going to fit up the stairs in their building, so it has to come through the front window. I'll let the photos do the talking. They say a picture tells a thousand words. If these pictures had voice boxes or fingers to hold pens and could write legibly, these are some of the words they would say:

"This thing is really fucking heavy, dude."

"Gijs, hurry up! Your mum can't hold it for much longer." (Ho ho ho! You laugh?)

"This is bullshit."

"No, I didn't piss my pants from straining. The water leaked out of the machine when we pulled it over the railing."

"This rope burn on my hands makes me look like I've been masturbating for 14 hours. You should see my dick."

"I am the strongest man alive."

"Great city planning you stupid 19th century Dutch pricks."

"I wish Shane Collins was here. I'd be drinking peach iced tea and the machine would already be in the rinse cycle."

Pulling a washing machine over a railing

Shit I've been getting down with lately:

The Gifthorse - From The Floor Up

Shane sent me the new Gifthorse ep the other day and I can't stop listening to it. It makes me wish I was at home to break my knee for real when they have their launch show. I have been playing it quite a bit in the office and everyone seems to like it. One of the girls said Shane's voice on the Spy vs. Spy cover reminds her of Gavin Rossdale from Bush... Haha. How's your Glycerine, Shane?

Young Governor - Virginia Creeper 7"

Dude from Fucked Up/No Warning's solo band. Super good. Maybe a little Dan Sartain-ish. Listen to it. Have a house party. Play it at that house party. Mack a babe. Woo her with your great taste in music. Tell her an impressive story about your friend Nick who is living in Amsterdam. Kiss her face.

A Guide To Recognising Your Saints

This movie has Robert Downey Jr., (B)Rosario Dawson, Chazz Palminteri and Dianne West in it as well as a bunch of young actors. It is one of the saddest stories/movies I have seen in a while. Kind of like a Wes Anderson movie but not funny, just depressing. It is set in Brooklyn in the 80s and is a true story, based on a book of the same name which I am going to to try and find this week. If you see it at a shop, buy it. If you can download it, do it. The scene with Dianne West and Robert Downey Jr. on the stairs when he goes back to see his parents after 15 years... Holy sad shit. Saddest.

William Elliott Whitmore - Animals In The Dark

We have been listening to this new album a lot at work because ANTI put it out. Really nice album. (Nice). Dude is touring here soon and I will get to see him play a few times. Stoked.

Hertog Jan

I guess this is maybe the Dutch answer to Coopers Pale Ale... In so much as it is brewed with fancy water under strict regulations regarding preservatives and all that shit. Hertog Jan literally translates to Duke John. Top bloke ol' Johnny! I'm thinking to get a Hertog Jan tattoo on my leg at some point before I leave...

Moha!

Gijs and I went to the Ocii (Cool little venue that used to be a squat about 20 years ago and now does proper shows) the other night while Santina stayed home and drank my Jack Daniels. We saw a collaboration between this Norwegian band Moha! and a couple of other people... They had a huge light setup across the front of the stage, like flood lights and strobes and all sorts of gnarly shit. They were kind of like early Fantomas, and were loud as fuck. Couple the sheer volume of their drums and their drum machine and other programming bits, and the blinding lights and it was a pretty awesome show. Gijs didn't like it, I bought a 12".

Shit I've not been getting down with lately:

Ben Lee

We listened to his new album at work a couple of times yesterday. The dude needs to shut his stupid koala looking face. A lot of people hated his older stuff, but I didn't mind some of it. After listening to this contrived horse shit, I can honestly say that if I were to ever be unlucky enough to meet him, I would tell Ben Lee his music really blows. You're not John Lennon, dude. You're not remotely close. You aren't allowed to have a song about Yoko Ono. Fuck. Ergh.

Vegemite

So the one small jar of Vegemite I bought at Brisbane Airport the day I left is well and truly finished. I went for a walk to the US/UK food store the other day which is on one of the busy touristy streets in Central Amsterdam. Luckily they sell antipodean novelties as well! I paid €6 for a 150g jar of Vegemite. I'm a stupid asshole. That is roughly $13 Australian. Old dude running the store must be glad there are douchers like me around who want to make delicious treats for themselves. I have been disfiguring at least four croissants a day in the microwave with Vegemite and cheese. If I keep it up I might become known as Fat Tits Lucas.

Dog shit

The savages living in this city. For the most part, I'm not a huge fan of dogs. Amsterdamians (Amsterdamites? Amsterdamese?) aren't helping me out so much. On every foot path, on every street, everywhere in this city; Dog shit. I haven't tread the stinky line yet, but the day it happens I'm going to fucking flip. I'll take a shit on a dog's foot and then we'll see what's up. Street by street, block by block... A Brownstorm.

Master Crumble for dinner